I Got Caught!!!

I don't know, maybe I should get thrown in perfectionist jail or enrolled in a clean freak probation program or something?

The other day we were having people over. We were cleaning. I say "we", because the whole family decided to pitch in because I asked for help. (Yeah, I am getting better, aren't you proud of me?!!!! Well, in theory, that's what I am saying but maybe it isn't 100% true just yet.)

My husband was so sweet. He cleaned the guest bathroom for me and was an enormous help.

I made a pact with myself long ago to always check the guest bathroom for myself when we were going to have company. This is because one time, I just glanced at the guest bath and it looked good to me. We had company, had a great time and after they were gone I had "a seat" in the guest bathroom, only to find, Reese's Cup Chocolate and Peanut butter hand prints in places that only a cute curly headed three year old could reach and were only visible in the "seated" position. I was so embarassed--- I am embarassed to say that having potty trained a little person recently, my first thought was (OH, NO!!!!). Then I realized as I ran through my head of how this could have possibly happened without my knowledge that it was in fact candy. Cute curly-headed little persons favorite food group. ... To a guest it really could be mistaken for something else....

So, I always take "a seat" in the guest bathroom before people come over. Well, I went to do this the other day, after my husband cleaned the guest bathroom and found splotches on the bottom of my mirror, the faucet had spots on it and the towel was not hanging right. So, I re-cleaned the guest bath while my hubby wasn't looking......I recleaned the whole thing. (I know it is a sickness.)

BUT HE CAUGHT ME!!!

Boy did I feel silly then. I had to apologize. Thankfully, he just laughed at me and told me I was crazy. He had every right to be completely frustrated with me. But thankfully, he extended grace towards this: "I-have-to-do-everything-around-here-if-it-is-going-to-be-done-correctly" nuthead.

Pause. (Here it comes...you've heard it before!) I realized I was being ridiculous. An approval freak, and perfectionist. I apologized to my husband and I had to apologize to God. Remember, I asked God to help me- and I keep returning to the same bad behavior.

I can laugh at myself now. I think when you really realize your forgiven, that sense of shame kind of goes away, and you can look at your mistakes and say you know....I was an idiot, but God loves me anyway.

And He does love us, even when we are ridiculous.